I've started using Twitter. Upon doing so, I was congratulated by a friend for having supposedly "grown up." I asked her to elaborate on her fairly condescending comment. She said that Facebook was going the way of Bebo. People go through a year-long phase of loving it, then before you know it everyone's moved on to the 'next big thing'. Which my friend seems to think is Twitter. It is true that in terms of Facebook, I'm rather over it. It's lost its appeal. Honestly, I have absolutely NO idea how I used to spend hours browsing that site. Other than for Farmville (yes, I was one of those people) it is unclear what could use up so much of my time. It boggles my mind.
These days I hop on Facebook once a day, twice a day maximum. I have a very quick browse of my live feed, say "Happy birthday x" to my loserish friends, reply to any wall posts, maybe throw up a status or change my dp- Then I'm off! Flash back about 2 years, and I would go online for hours at a time. I would dilligently study the live feed, comment wherever I felt my comment was needed, browse through friends' photo albums, stalk good looking guys, stalk good looking girls if I was especially bored, add anyone who I'd ever so much as walked past in my life, mail secrets to friends, chat to acquaintances.. The list goes on. How on Earth did I not get bored outta my mind?
Some aspects of Facebook are still cool and appealing to me. I like the new chat, regardless of what others are complaining about. It's faster and clearer and better. I like that you can 'like' things, whether that be photographs or statuses or people's comments. I like that you can keep in contact with people on the other side of the world. I like that I've used the word 'like' six times in this paragraph.
Twitter is hard to get used to. At first, I saw 'RT' and thought it might mean 'Reckless Thomas' or 'Raining Trains' or 'Rooftop Telescope'. But no, geniuses of the world, it means 'Retweet', and is used when you like what someone else has said and want to put it out again. Then there's the 'hashtags'. When you want to put a thought out under a heading, you do so by placing a hash symbol (aka #) before the keyword that sums up your tweet. For example:
Ugh, I don't wanna get outta bed! #ihatemondays
I just met Paul Henry.. #controversy #racistdouche
First day of my new job today #nerves
I'm glad I've "grown up". Twitter is fun. And I feel closer to Kim Kardashian than ever before.
I hope I have enlightened you a little, all four of my followers. MAKE A BLOGGER ACCOUNT AND FOLLOW ME. I'm not desperate. Peace out!
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Sunday, July 10, 2011
Internet Fame
The title of this blog entry may well seem like an oxymoron. Is there really such a thing as being FAMOUS on the INTERNET. Some might attempt to debate this, but the answer is yes, there is. I myself am not famous on the internet. I have 4 official followers, and my mother often reads my entries. Or I force her to listen to me read my entries. But currently I am somewhat addicted to a 'youtube celebrity' names Natalie Tran. She has a channel called 'communitychannel', where she posts various videos (over 200 of them to date) based on the random things that she notices in her everyday life. Things like:
-Killing a spider, and then worrying that the spider's family will seek revenge.
-The way people try to casually look over their shoulder when someone says "Don't look now but...".
-The awkwardness of sharing your umbrella with a stranger in rainy weather.
-The way everytime someone is reported dead on telly, the neighbours refer to the victim as "such a nice girl!"
I think part of the reason that I allign so well with her is the fact that we share a lot of the same ideas and, like me, she is kinda obsessed with cleanliness, germs, and the behaviours of others. As far as I'm concerned, Natalie is famous on the internet. She is proof of its possibility. She notices things that not many other people would notice, things that make you think "Oh my goodness, yes! People so do that!" Internet fame is indeed an option. It's surely hard, and has its downsides, but to me it seems like a good place to be. Eventually, and on youtube especially, your ideas and videos are agreed with and watched so often that you are able to make money off of it. Win.
Other youtubers to check out who I consider internet-famous:
Ryan Higa (nigahiga)
Kevin Wu (KevJumba & JumbaFund)
Shay Carl and family (SHAYTARDS)
... This list may be revised as my life continues. So watch this space. Also I am vaguely considering making a youtube channel. But hey, that's unlikely to happen and my chance of being internet famous is extremely low. I just don't have the hair for it.
-Killing a spider, and then worrying that the spider's family will seek revenge.
-The way people try to casually look over their shoulder when someone says "Don't look now but...".
-The awkwardness of sharing your umbrella with a stranger in rainy weather.
-The way everytime someone is reported dead on telly, the neighbours refer to the victim as "such a nice girl!"
I think part of the reason that I allign so well with her is the fact that we share a lot of the same ideas and, like me, she is kinda obsessed with cleanliness, germs, and the behaviours of others. As far as I'm concerned, Natalie is famous on the internet. She is proof of its possibility. She notices things that not many other people would notice, things that make you think "Oh my goodness, yes! People so do that!" Internet fame is indeed an option. It's surely hard, and has its downsides, but to me it seems like a good place to be. Eventually, and on youtube especially, your ideas and videos are agreed with and watched so often that you are able to make money off of it. Win.
Other youtubers to check out who I consider internet-famous:
Ryan Higa (nigahiga)
Kevin Wu (KevJumba & JumbaFund)
Shay Carl and family (SHAYTARDS)
... This list may be revised as my life continues. So watch this space. Also I am vaguely considering making a youtube channel. But hey, that's unlikely to happen and my chance of being internet famous is extremely low. I just don't have the hair for it.
Saturday, July 9, 2011
Ditherers
To dither is to pause unnecessarily in a situation where others would prefer you rushed.
The above definition wasn't taken from a dictionary, though I can see why one might assume so. I wrote it myself. Impressed? You should be. My mother is very intolerant of these people who dither, people otherwise refered to in the Pattie household as 'ditherers'. It's those people who take their sweet time comparing tuna brands in the supermarket whilst blocking you and three other trolleys from briskly browsing the aisles and selecting anything you can grab at that might get eaten. It's these people who spend their time folding napkins dilligently and neatly as opposed to setting out the acutal cutlery at an event. It's these people who get in the way, and sometimes walk funny.
I have at times found myself dithering. Working as a checkout chick, it's easy to dither. There's a hole in a bag of icing sugar and you're just not switched on today. So instead of doing the normal thing and swooping it into a bag and calling a grocery boy over the intercom to come and replace it, you find that you're instead watching the sugar pour and thinking about how the hole might've got there to start with. Yes. You're dithering. You realise this and snap out of it, but it's already too late. You dithered, and the customer saw you dither.
What would your mother say?
The above definition wasn't taken from a dictionary, though I can see why one might assume so. I wrote it myself. Impressed? You should be. My mother is very intolerant of these people who dither, people otherwise refered to in the Pattie household as 'ditherers'. It's those people who take their sweet time comparing tuna brands in the supermarket whilst blocking you and three other trolleys from briskly browsing the aisles and selecting anything you can grab at that might get eaten. It's these people who spend their time folding napkins dilligently and neatly as opposed to setting out the acutal cutlery at an event. It's these people who get in the way, and sometimes walk funny.
I have at times found myself dithering. Working as a checkout chick, it's easy to dither. There's a hole in a bag of icing sugar and you're just not switched on today. So instead of doing the normal thing and swooping it into a bag and calling a grocery boy over the intercom to come and replace it, you find that you're instead watching the sugar pour and thinking about how the hole might've got there to start with. Yes. You're dithering. You realise this and snap out of it, but it's already too late. You dithered, and the customer saw you dither.
What would your mother say?
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Status Updates
Some people have an inability to filter information in their heads. They can't decide what needs to be said on a public forum, and what should just be kept inside their mind grapes.
I had a facebook friend (note 'had'- past tense) who would constantly write status updates, using the innocence of facebook to tweet. This is a breif, and possibly slightly exaggerated, example of her status updates over the course of just 2 hours on an average weekday:
9.23am OMG I had such a weird dream!
9.25am Off to have a shower now :)
9.34am Refreshed and ready for my big day..
9.46am Breakfast with @Kane Thomas
9.55am Ugh, eggs taking forever!! Can't get decent service these days.
10.04am Yumm! Worth the wait :D
10.17am Don't want to go to my uni lecture..
10.22am Can someone give me a ride to my uni lecture?
You get the idea.
You'd think that when NOBODY comments on or likes your status, you'd pick up on the vibes that no-one is in any way interested in what you have to say. It's these kinds of statuses also that make everyone wants to post rude and sarcastic comments, such as 'Cool story bro' or 'How riveting!'. It is quite possible that I am the only person bitchy and harsh enough to actually follow through and publish these comments. So before defriending this reject who has no self-awareness, I liked every status down her page and commented on each one individually. Boo-yah.
Status updates, to me, are something to be kept sacred. Unless you have something either hilariously witty or of public interest to say, shut the heck up! Read it over before you hit post. If it doesn't make you smile or excited to share with the world, delete it and just text it to a friend. Simple. Your friends don't need a play-by-play of everything in your day. So keep statuses far and few between, with humour where possible and as little tags to individuals as possible. This is another way of deflecting people off reading (and potentially liking) your status. If you've tagged a bunch of your friends, even if the status itself is funny, outsiders will not want to like it in case they look like they're trying too hard or trying to get in on the action.
I am a wealth of knowledge.
I had a facebook friend (note 'had'- past tense) who would constantly write status updates, using the innocence of facebook to tweet. This is a breif, and possibly slightly exaggerated, example of her status updates over the course of just 2 hours on an average weekday:
9.23am OMG I had such a weird dream!
9.25am Off to have a shower now :)
9.34am Refreshed and ready for my big day..
9.46am Breakfast with @Kane Thomas
9.55am Ugh, eggs taking forever!! Can't get decent service these days.
10.04am Yumm! Worth the wait :D
10.17am Don't want to go to my uni lecture..
10.22am Can someone give me a ride to my uni lecture?
You get the idea.
You'd think that when NOBODY comments on or likes your status, you'd pick up on the vibes that no-one is in any way interested in what you have to say. It's these kinds of statuses also that make everyone wants to post rude and sarcastic comments, such as 'Cool story bro' or 'How riveting!'. It is quite possible that I am the only person bitchy and harsh enough to actually follow through and publish these comments. So before defriending this reject who has no self-awareness, I liked every status down her page and commented on each one individually. Boo-yah.
Status updates, to me, are something to be kept sacred. Unless you have something either hilariously witty or of public interest to say, shut the heck up! Read it over before you hit post. If it doesn't make you smile or excited to share with the world, delete it and just text it to a friend. Simple. Your friends don't need a play-by-play of everything in your day. So keep statuses far and few between, with humour where possible and as little tags to individuals as possible. This is another way of deflecting people off reading (and potentially liking) your status. If you've tagged a bunch of your friends, even if the status itself is funny, outsiders will not want to like it in case they look like they're trying too hard or trying to get in on the action.
I am a wealth of knowledge.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
The Wheels On The Bus :)
So I live over the bridge, and am therefore forced to commute to uni on a daily basis. The trip takes approximately 74 minutes. I find it funny how, when getting onto the bus, everybody sits on a window seat by themselves. Nobody ever makes a friend and sits by someone they don't know.
What an antisocial world we live in.
In saying that, however, I don't appreciate strange-smelling people sitting by me. And generally, after waking up for my run at 6am, I'm not in the mood for making new friends. Or having people try to commuicate with me at all for that matter.
But, the bus is a good place to seek out hotties or notties. I have a slight obsession with the song Tonight (I'm Lovin' You) by the delicious Enrique. I have a theory that one morning on the bus, just as the awesome beats of the chorus start to kick in on this song, I will make eye contact with a total babe. For once, the lyrics of this song might finally be relevant to my life.. Okay I should NOT have just confessed that to goodness knows who online. But I have like one follower anyway, so nothing to lose.
Bottom line: If you're hot, look at me on the bus so I can make eye contact with you and have my weird Enrique fantasy come true.
This blog was pointless.
COOL STORY BRO.
What an antisocial world we live in.
In saying that, however, I don't appreciate strange-smelling people sitting by me. And generally, after waking up for my run at 6am, I'm not in the mood for making new friends. Or having people try to commuicate with me at all for that matter.
But, the bus is a good place to seek out hotties or notties. I have a slight obsession with the song Tonight (I'm Lovin' You) by the delicious Enrique. I have a theory that one morning on the bus, just as the awesome beats of the chorus start to kick in on this song, I will make eye contact with a total babe. For once, the lyrics of this song might finally be relevant to my life.. Okay I should NOT have just confessed that to goodness knows who online. But I have like one follower anyway, so nothing to lose.
Bottom line: If you're hot, look at me on the bus so I can make eye contact with you and have my weird Enrique fantasy come true.
This blog was pointless.
COOL STORY BRO.
Friday, March 4, 2011
That really wasn't funny. But you're cute.
I currently have several crushes on several guys across several of my university classes. The main thread that I've found links them all together in my girlish imagination is the fact that they are interested in the same thing as me: writing. One of these blokes in particular is really into books. He mentioned in a class that he is always reading a book at any given time, and when asked to talk about his current fix, launched into a delcious discussion about use of metaphor and how beautifully the writer creates an atmosphere. I felt a bit flustered by this point.
But then, seemingly out of nowhere, he did the unthinkable. He made a joke. And it was not funny.
I love funny guys. In fact, I've been known to date a guy JUST based on his sense of humour. Like Timmy, for example. Okay names have been changed. No-one in today's world is called Timmy unless they're the star of Nickelodeon's 'Fairly Odd Parents.' Timmy wasn't the most delicious-looking grape in the bunch. But his biting wit and belly-wobbling humour made me see him in a whole new light.. Of course, eventually lack of attractiveness becomes an issue. He wanted to kiss me. I just wanted him to tell me another joke.
So this guy in one of my classes. We'll call him Jonas. Partly because I don't want to use his actual name in case at some point in time he reads this. Partly because I don't yet know his name. Jonas cracked a dry one and the spell was broken. Ugh, and grow up, by cracked a dry one I do NOT mean that he passed wind. Despite his dashing good looks, and his ability to speak in English-based terms, his unfunniness was a painful reminder that I can't get the best of everything. I have to make do.
Perhaps, at some point in the imagined future, Jonas and I will have a chance to talk one-on-one and not just in a classroom situation. Maybe he is actually a budding comedian and just felt that making everyone erupt into fits of laughter during a lecture would be inappropriate. Yeah.
So what've we got:
He's hot. As.
He's smart.
He's into reading.
He's well-dressed.
He's a budding comedian with a respect for basic etiquette and class rules.
Now to find out his name!
But then, seemingly out of nowhere, he did the unthinkable. He made a joke. And it was not funny.
I love funny guys. In fact, I've been known to date a guy JUST based on his sense of humour. Like Timmy, for example. Okay names have been changed. No-one in today's world is called Timmy unless they're the star of Nickelodeon's 'Fairly Odd Parents.' Timmy wasn't the most delicious-looking grape in the bunch. But his biting wit and belly-wobbling humour made me see him in a whole new light.. Of course, eventually lack of attractiveness becomes an issue. He wanted to kiss me. I just wanted him to tell me another joke.
So this guy in one of my classes. We'll call him Jonas. Partly because I don't want to use his actual name in case at some point in time he reads this. Partly because I don't yet know his name. Jonas cracked a dry one and the spell was broken. Ugh, and grow up, by cracked a dry one I do NOT mean that he passed wind. Despite his dashing good looks, and his ability to speak in English-based terms, his unfunniness was a painful reminder that I can't get the best of everything. I have to make do.
Perhaps, at some point in the imagined future, Jonas and I will have a chance to talk one-on-one and not just in a classroom situation. Maybe he is actually a budding comedian and just felt that making everyone erupt into fits of laughter during a lecture would be inappropriate. Yeah.
So what've we got:
He's hot. As.
He's smart.
He's into reading.
He's well-dressed.
He's a budding comedian with a respect for basic etiquette and class rules.
Now to find out his name!
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Kill me now.
A friend of mine recently told me that I constantly over-exaggerate. At first I was upset by this statement, and felt like it was something of a personal attack. But ever since they said this, it's made me realise how often I really do exaggerate things just in every day life.
For example.
On Christmas Day, I got texts from several friends asking what I got. I told them 'Aww, heaps!' I say 'heaps' frequently. But when you think about it, the literal meaning of 'heaps' brings to the imagination a picture of a heap of rubbish at a refuse dump. That's a lot of rubbish. That's a heap of rubbish. A large amount. My gifts last Christmas would barely fill half a bin bag, let alone a rubbish HEAP.
About a week ago I told a work collegue that I owned 3 pairs of Mi Piaci shoes. Now, this one was a cross between a lie and an over-exaggeration. I have 1 pair of Mi Piaci shoes. And I got them second hand at an opshop in Browns Bay. So they may well be either fake or so overused that they are no longer considered designer.
Yesterday, I stumbled on the street as I was walking to the bus stop from my second uni lecture of the year. As soon as this happened, I instinctively called out "UGH, kill me now!". The friend who I was walking with said nothing, but the ever-present voice in my head said: "Yeah, Grace. You're overexaggerating again." Of course I didn't actually want someone to hop out of a shop with a knife and stab me viciously in the chest. That would be more uncool than my previous trip in the middle of a busy street.
This morning I got up late and, upon realising that I was gonna be late for a movie date with a good friend (with romantic past, yes) I announced that I hated my life. I do not hate my life. My life is amazing and I wouldn't trade it in for the world. Okay, that was another exaggeration. Of course I would. I mean, the world! The WORLD!! That's a pretty big deal. I'd take it. Fo' Sho'.
So don't get me wrong, this blog isn't me making a resolution to stop over-exaggerating. Because in all honesty, I like the freedom of exaggeration. It makes stories more exciting, and my blonde-teenager image obvious. Plus it has a tendency to draw attention to me. And let's face it; I love that. Heaps.
For example.
On Christmas Day, I got texts from several friends asking what I got. I told them 'Aww, heaps!' I say 'heaps' frequently. But when you think about it, the literal meaning of 'heaps' brings to the imagination a picture of a heap of rubbish at a refuse dump. That's a lot of rubbish. That's a heap of rubbish. A large amount. My gifts last Christmas would barely fill half a bin bag, let alone a rubbish HEAP.
About a week ago I told a work collegue that I owned 3 pairs of Mi Piaci shoes. Now, this one was a cross between a lie and an over-exaggeration. I have 1 pair of Mi Piaci shoes. And I got them second hand at an opshop in Browns Bay. So they may well be either fake or so overused that they are no longer considered designer.
Yesterday, I stumbled on the street as I was walking to the bus stop from my second uni lecture of the year. As soon as this happened, I instinctively called out "UGH, kill me now!". The friend who I was walking with said nothing, but the ever-present voice in my head said: "Yeah, Grace. You're overexaggerating again." Of course I didn't actually want someone to hop out of a shop with a knife and stab me viciously in the chest. That would be more uncool than my previous trip in the middle of a busy street.
This morning I got up late and, upon realising that I was gonna be late for a movie date with a good friend (with romantic past, yes) I announced that I hated my life. I do not hate my life. My life is amazing and I wouldn't trade it in for the world. Okay, that was another exaggeration. Of course I would. I mean, the world! The WORLD!! That's a pretty big deal. I'd take it. Fo' Sho'.
So don't get me wrong, this blog isn't me making a resolution to stop over-exaggerating. Because in all honesty, I like the freedom of exaggeration. It makes stories more exciting, and my blonde-teenager image obvious. Plus it has a tendency to draw attention to me. And let's face it; I love that. Heaps.
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